I knew

Where are you now? Where will you be when I will be away? Where haunt thee? witch doors are you knocking to? And in the end ... what do you care?I leave you behind, haha! I'll leave you ... you fade in everyday life, drowning yourself in the crowd, mammoth sun of hell! Sink, as I shall raise strong, baptized in blood and fire! and you will sit back and think. Will you not stop me? Do not you want revenge? (... Alas! was this a premonition that at the time I wrote it?)
Are not thee the one who told me that every hour hurts? Hmm ... but you argue about it now monsiuer. You are becoming happier. Even besides that, how can you hurt a wretched man? existing only physically and drained ... Spiritually, mentally dissected, visceral grief?
"Give me an answer!"  howls Elise full of balls ... and they say she's shy :))
But shut up. Why should you keep the silence? Why do not yell at me like usual? Why do you not swear? Why not hit me with bestiality? Why not try to strangle me? Maybe this time I'll even manage to die. I can do it, I'm sure of it, I just need a little help! And you know it! Only every time you see how close I was. But you always stopped. It's nice to see me as I struggle in my days of suffering, than to give proof of decency and put an end to my pain. And do not you stop at a greater cause. I know the pain, and you remain indifferent to my suffering. To my tears, my cries and my nightmares. I wake up at night screaming ... I dream i die.  i die horribly. I'm afraid of freedom .... I fear, are am a coward .... like you.
Nights I walk alone on the streets. Cool ass cars honk and a punk invites me in. Hood boys look at me as i pass them by and not once happened for one to touch me. it happened a few times... only a few times ... I had to deal with rapists. Where were you then? Bathing in indifference and yet you wondered where was i. So that when I return, you can corporally punish mefor things i did not do. I stand under your abusive domination.